New Year’s Resolutions are rubbish!

The ancient Babylonians are said to be the first to mention New Year resolutions so they’ve been around for over 4000 years.  Although their new year was likely to happen in Spring as they worked to the agricultural year, which would have started when new growth appeared.  Spring, in my opinion, would be the perfect time for a bit of reflection and a sense of renewal.  The depths of mid winter is a really hard time to make big changes.

Alongside being a poor time of year for transformation, it’s also how resolutions are approached these days that I’ve got a problem with.  Don’t get me wrong, I’ve set them in the past.  Did I achieve them?  Maybe eventually, but certainly not in the timeframe of a usual New Year intention which goes something like this - 

Me at the end of December:

This year has been a bit meh and I’ve seriously over indulged at Christmas.

I’m going to change things up next year!

Starting first of Jan everything is going to shift, starting with <insert NY Resolution here>.

First of Jan:

Today is a bank holiday.  And so is tomorrow (in Scotland), so I’ll start on the 3rd.

3rd Jan:

Goal achieved!

4th Jan:

Goal achieved!

5th Jan:

Goal somewhat achieved!

6th Jan:

Had a social event today so the goal is, understandably, paused.

8th Jan:

I should really get back to that goal…

10th Jan:

What goal?

And repeat annually.

I’ve got absolutely no issue with setting goals, targets or whatever feels good to call them.  Not at all.  In fact, much of my Coaching with Sarah programme is focused entirely on them.

What I’ve got a problem with is setting a high bar, after a period of indulgence and pseudo-hibernation, at a time of year when motivation is especially hard because of the dark mornings and short days (if you live in the UK or similar).  It’s one of the hardest times to set yourself a challenge and we need to be warmed up a bit in order to achieve hard things.

However, reflecting on the previous year, making plans and setting a horizon point of where you want to get to by the end of the year is a marvellous thing, as long as you’re treating it as a marathon not a sprint.  New Year’s Resolutions are usually overly ambitious and don’t come with the map of how to achieve them so often fail.  And then you feel bad about not managing to stick to them and that can actually make things worse than if you’d not tried at all.  

Doing some reflection in January, or that delicious twixtmas time between Christmas and New Year should absolutely be encouraged, but let’s put some effort into working out how that plan might go, anticipating what might get in your way and setting some milestones so you can celebrate progress rather than waiting to celebrate the final destination, yeah?

Now, I just so happen to have a course designed to help you do just this.  I’ve created the Cartographer’s Compass - a mix of self-guided reflection and live workshops throughout the year to not only set your goals for the year, but also draw the map of how to get there and check in to adjust and adapt the plan as life will, inevitably, throw a curve ball or two at you as the year progresses.

If it’s not the right time for you to join us on the maiden voyage of the Cartographer’s Compass, here are some free tips on how to approach a little new year life mapping:

• See your goal not as a final destination but as an horizon point which is placed on the map, with further places to go beyond, some of which might be terra incognita (land unknown) or my favourite variation, terra nondum cognita (land not yet known).
• Think about your goals in terms of  how much time you have, the balance with your other priorities and in the context of what else is going on.  This will help you take a more realistic approach.
• Break big ambitious goals down into stages, so you can create a manageable action plan where you can see and appreciate incremental progress
• Celebrate achievements as you go along through some sort of reward system
• Accept that your plan will change and your goal might shift too.  An openness to uncertainty and a willingness to shift the metaphorical goal posts will keep you motivated and more likely to make change stick.